We sometimes snap at the ones who are close to us. We have high expectation of them because they are supposed to know us best and we can tell them anything, sounds familiar?

Fyiona had a tough decision to make.

After a 14-year successful career at Shell, she decided to take a break and pursue her passion, something that she is passionate about and considers extremely important, to bridge the gaps between generations in workplaces. 

When Fyiona finally broke the news to her dad, she was met with "why do you all millennials like to chase after your dream?”

Fyiona paused, took a deep breath to explore the question from his dad, "dad, what was one crazy adventure you did when you were young?”

It was this insatiable curiosity, taking a real interest in her dad's comment which took Fyiona to discover an uncharted world which she didn't know it existed. 

Her dad spoke at length about how he made Fyiona's grandparents sell their sewing machine for US$100. He used the money to backpack, took a ferry from Malaysia to India, and then hopped on trains and went through Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iran and travelled all the way to Germany. The commute took two months and he was only 19 years old. Her dad fell in love with Germany. That was one CRAZY adventure at that age!

Photo of Fyiona's dad (19 YO, top right) with his friends on a boat from Malaysia to India)

Fyiona's dad (on the right) and his friend, photo taken in Afghanistan

After this chat, their relationship reached new heights. The outcome would have been very different had Fyiona decided to react otherwise. And that took curiosity, patience and really listening to why his father was giving that comment. Beneath the question from her dad, he was just worried about his daughter's future. The comment just didn't come out the way he had wanted. There's often a disconnect between good intention and perception. 

Fyiona got this text from her dad after listening to the podcast.

Fyiona's thought on how to bridge the gaps between generations in our society:

It takes both sides to do that.

Before we speak,

• Are we listening to understand or listening to respond and give advice? 
• What were you like when you were young?
• Are we looking at others as service providers to help us?

About Fyiona Yong

Fyiona is an intergenerational leadership coach. She works with leaders and young talents to help them understand each other better. Different generations have more similarities than you think.